Signs

Just a few weeks ago I was beside my Daddy when he took his last breath of life. He was 77 years old. Letting go is never an easy thing to do. I have to be honest and say it helps when you really lost them years before God calls them to their forever home. My grandma left me the same way as my Dad. She had Alzheimer's and he had Dementia. You just watch while life as they once knew just disappears. Day by day, moment by moment. Both once full of so much life! Never would they have wanted to spend their last years in a hospital bed having to be cared for like a baby. My Mother was the angel that cared for both of them. Giving up her life to take care of them. Never complaining! She took care of them at home so that she knew they were being treated well, cleaned, feed, and most of all loved. Knowing they were free from those beds and so full of life again in the arms of our Heavenly Father made it easier to let them go. Still, for some reason I have been feeling “flat”. I have questioned myself coming up empty with answers. I loved my Daddy, and I have no doubt he loved me. He loved his grandchildren and spent every second he could with them. He loved his great grandchildren. I took them to visit every weekend. Even after he stop talking he would laugh at Eli acting silly for him. I have no regrets, I said all that needed to be said and did everything I could to help my Mom take care of him. Yesterday, when I got home I believe my “sign” was waiting on me. There on the door handle of the house was the most beautiful butterfly with the prettiest shades of blue on it's wings I have ever seen. It flew off and then back around. In that moment, all I could think of was my Daddy's pretty blue eyes and how free he was now, just like that butterfly. I think that little butterfly was God's most precious way of speaking to me. Telling me that it's okay to let go, that he has my Daddy with him and he is now free from any pain and sorrow. For me, I choose to believe in signs!